A few months ago I lost trust in myself. It doesn’t really matter how it happened. What concerns me is that it happened.
As a result, I decided the remedy was to defer to others. I reasoned that since I couldn’t trust myself to make good decisions, I should let others make them for me. Or I should at least consult them before I did anything of importance I might later regret.
This was understandable after what I had been through, but in retrospect I do not think it was the wisest course of action. Shouldn’t the remedy be to rebuild trust in myself and maintain my own power, instead of giving it away to others? Since when did my life become a group effort?
There is nothing wrong with wanting to grow in wisdom or to make yourself accountable to others for a particular goal you have for yourself. What is concerning is when you discover you are more invested in doing what you think others might think you should do, rather than in doing what you want to do. When I saw this in myself, I realized I had swung too far the other way.
What I learned is rebuilding trust in oneself requires that we listen to our head, our heart, and our gut and not feel like we have to justify our decisions to others or elicit their approval. While it its true we all need people we trust as sounding boards, ultimately it is our life to live.
Sacrificing ourselves by deferring to others in not the remedy. The remedy is found in strengthening our own sense of self by regaining faith in our ability to hear God and to walk in the path he has prepared for us. A path that is uniquely ours, that no one can walk for us.